They
told her its survival of the fittest
You
must protect your family before you protect yourself
They
call it the south side of chicago
but
to her its just a city of shooting in Englewood
She
just wants an education
She
just wants to fit in
She
is different then most
She
is bigger and likes to cook
She
has mood swings like the weather
Happy
as the sun
Depressed
like the snow
She
spins out with a motive
stabbed
like a piece of meat
A
pretty black girl is not what she is known for
She
is a dark skin
Momma
always told her "The blacker the berry the sweeter the juice"
But
that only meant something to momma
Daddy wasn't in my life to tell how nice I look
In
society its all about being light
She
wears dark colors to not show her curves
She
works all day to put money in her pocket
From
babysitting to wrapping hot dogs
she
has to make a living
She
has so many responsibilities
Momma
struggles to give her lunch money
Daddy was a drug dealer kicked out the house
School
teachers don't make the time to help you with school
College
seems nice but can you afford it?
She
ditches school to hang at the local spot
The
MLK Rink better then Cascades
Where
it was more then Roller skates
She
sees city lights, fights, guns
She
hates it.
Everyone
knew everything
The
latest shooting or break in
People
never understood that wasn’t her
Everyone
wasn’t her friend. Gossip was your friend
Police
always asked you questions
You
couldn’t ignore them or you were known as one of them
Gangs
Vice
lord, crip, gdk, gd , bloodz
That’s
what you were. That’s what you grew into
Black
people was all you had
But
black on black crime happened so often she was confused
Mother
always took her to Charlotte where she saw beautiful trees
constant
weather of beautiful sun
things
she wasnt used to seeing in the city
She
wasn’t judge , didn’t always have to wear the latest shoes
She
saw a different skin color then what she was used to
They
were nice to her and she didn’t understand
They
waved and said hello
She
felt like herself
She
loved her city but it was more then shopping and pretty people
It
was about protecting whats yours
This
characterization describes the girl known as me. It explains where I grew up
around and was used to seeing. It talks about how people weren’t the people I really
liked in the world. My life didn’t want to be known around gangs and bad
schooling. I’ve been working since I was 10 and I didn’t want to spend my money
on the latest gear and or shoes. I wanted to focus on me and that’s what I explained.
Tatiana
Tatiana,
ReplyDeleteI found this to be so vivid in the way it was written, and I really enjoyed reading it. I could really get a sense of where you are from, and I could tell how honest and emotional this poem is. It is amazing to me that we are from the same state, yet when I looked out my window I saw cornfields, but you saw something completely different. I also really respect the fact that you hold your education in such high regard because so many of us take it for granted, but you made it a priority and I find that very commendable.
Allie
ReplyDeleteTatiana,
Your writing was raw and full of intense detailed emotion. I am moved by the way you describe something so personal with such strength. You are able to share with us a deeper picture of yourself by opening the window into your world as both a child and adolescent. Your lines, “A pretty black girl is not what she is known for She is a dark skin Momma always told her ‘The blacker the berry the sweeter the juice’ But that only meant something to momma”. Discrimination and segregation even amongst the same race of people is something many never talk about. Life has a way of hitting us with “realities” that can often time introduce us to misconceptions unfathomable at a young age. You are an example of a young lady striving for excellence. A beautiful soul you are!
-Caroline
Tatiana,
ReplyDeleteYou've worked very hard to capture the anxiety and tension that you associate with Chicago, and it provides a perspective on Chicago that runs counter to the typical upper or middle class presentation of the city that focuses on its amenities and iconic locations. Indeed, your Chicago is a person who is cautious---watching out for herself and her loved ones and trying to build an opportunity for something better. Your lines about working to save money for yourself and your family drive home this idea of caution and frugality, such as when you write, "She wasn’t judge , didn’t always have to wear the latest shoes." Yet, the anxiety you describe is merged with a sense of acceptance, or at least familiarity, with how things are. Although your character wants more, the violence and corruption that she witnesses is so familiar that it sometimes fades into the background as part of the scenery. Very nicely written!
Tatiana,
ReplyDeleteI think this description of your hometown is very vivid and well-written. I have never been to Chicago, and I’m not used to big cities, but your details made me able to imagine what it could only be like to be from a place like that. The ups and downs in your emotions really showed me how Chicago can make you feel. I have always heard crazy stories about it and I plan on going to visit it soon. But I know I will never know what it is like to live in a place like the part of Chicago you describe, and through your blog, I feel like I am as close to the experience as I could possibly be.